Saturday, October 24, 2009

Why do some kids believe in Santa?

Good article about Santa beliefs here

The Great Santa Debate

Ok...so with the cooler weather and all...I have started thinking about Christmas. So Josh and I were talking today about SANTA. I was raised NOT believing in Santa, but he was. So we were talking about what we are going to do with Claire. Obviously, he thinks we should teach her to believe in Santa, but I don't. I think we are pretty much polar-opposites on this topic. So if you celebrate Christmas, what are you teaching your kids? I remember talking about Santa last year, but it didn't really matter because Claire's new vocab at Christmas consisted of "pretty light" and "big tree." She now however has a huge grasp of language and will probably get it pretty well...to a degree. So maybe we could just play pretend this year and not worry about things till next year? Really to her -- Barney or whatever else she sees on TV probably seem pretty real to her anyways.

My dad was born in Germany, so we celebrated the Christmas season mostly the German way, which includes the entire Advent Season which are the four Sundays prior to Christmas. We would open a smaller gift each advent and light a candle on an Advent wreath. Then my mom would read something from the Bible. Actually she read first then we got to open the presents...I don't really remember paying much attention, but just being excited about presents! I remember one year my sister Holly and I were super-into Charm Bracelets!!! Those things rocked!

Then on Christmas eve we would have a big dinner with family, go to Christmas eve service at church where the last song would usually be "SILENT NIGHT" sung by candle light, then come home and open all the rest of the gifts. It was a fun and late night. My parents were brilliant. This way, we kids were well entertained the next morning with new stuff. Meanwhile, nobody was waking them up early to open gifts. Ha! Then we'd usually go to my Aunt Lee's house for a big Christmas lunch and a gift exchange with them.

Every year we also got chocolate Advent Calendars. It had 24 little doors with one bigger door for Christmas day. Each door contained a piece of chocolate about the size of a Hershey Kiss. Yum. Somedays, I would be naughty and eat more than one piece. Then I would shut the door of the day I stole that piece from. But then I would be sad when I opened that number and the candy was already gone. Ha. Mine was always gone well before Christmas!

My absolute 100% favorite part about teaching German was teaching about Christmas...it was probably the only class where kids got to even talk about Christmas. If anyone out-does Americans on Christmas, it is the Germans. Germany around Advent and Christmas rocks!!! There are a lot of other German Christmas traditions, like the Christmas markets. There is actually one in Chicago that closely rivals the German ones.

The first time I went was a field trip in HS when it was still very small. We went back about 5 years ago...let's see it was my mom, Holly, my friend Anja who was visiting from Germany, cousin Sue, and maybe a few other women...headed up there...and it was HUGE! They had large tents and heated areas...because basically it's like a farmer's market, which means BRR!!!! in Chicago in Nov/Dec! But it was absolutely marvelous...tons of foods, drinks, and crafts to look at. Something big in Germany at Christmas is called "Gluehwein" which is like a hot spiced fruit punch with alcohol. Well that description sounds kind of nasty, but it's actually pretty good.

So back to the Santa thing...did you that "St. Nickolaus" originated in Germany? Well, according to the cultural component that we were teaching to the kids at the time I was teaching, that's the way it goes. Scroll down through this page and onto the next to read more about Santa origins.

So basically as a kid, my siblings and I were taught that Santa was something that was fun to believe in and not to spoil it for other kids who did believe in it. I remember last year that Josh told me he was crushed when he was having doubts about Santa and he asked his mom if Santa was real, and she finally told him "No."

I guess my issue with it is that I feel like it is teaching a lie. And I really don't want to lie to my kid just to have some fun. I really don't see any fun in that. We always made a birthday cake for Jesus and sang him "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" on Christmas eve to remember the whole reason for Christmas was Jesus being born. Personally, I think it's a great excuse to have some cake. :) So what to do? What to do??? How do you compromise and KIND OF teach a belief in Santa? I mean, yeah, you could get into the whole religion debate, but let's deal with Santa first.

We also did put out milk and cookies for Santa...I'm not even sure if my parents grew up believing in Santa...I kind of doubt it since my Dad was born in Germany and my mom was from a pretty strict Lutheran household. Personally, I always thought that kids who believed in Santa were a little bit stupid...that would be like believing in Mickey Mouse and him being real. No offense to anyone. But also, and no offense here, I think it's kind of silly to get Christmas gifts from Josh's mom/step-dad that say "From Santa"--really? MAYBE HE IS REAL!?!

Friday, October 23, 2009

28 month update

Yesterday I was peeling apples with my Pampered Chef Apple Peeler/Corer/Slicer. Claire was watching very carefully and asked, "That hurt the apple?"

As I said before, she LOVES HIDING. She will tunnel into blankets or a clean basket of clothes and yell, "Find me! Wanna find me? Come find me! Where I go?!"

She likes to also play this teasing game where she pretends everything is hers. She will say, "That's mine." Then she wants me to pretend I want it so she prompts me to "Say that's mine!"

Knows almost all colors and shapes...even the funky ones most of the time.

Sometimes identifies letters/shapes...I'm not too worried about this at this point. She knows what letters are versus numbers and can sometimes tell me what it is.

She can put on velcro tennis shoes and aqua socks...she has done sandals since her 2nd bday. I was very excited when I discovered that she could put her tennis shoes on by herself!

She climbs in and out of car seat/stroller/highchair or booster seat pretty well.

She hasn't discovered how to open doors, but I always discourage her from touching the doorknob. I'm sure she'll figure it out soon enough.

She still nurses 2-3 times/day...always before bed to fall asleep and for naps at home. Seriously...this is the best knock out medicine known to man!

She will help me unload the bottom rack of the dishwasher and hands me stuff to put up in the cupboard. I'm sure this will become increasingly useful as my belly grows.

She loves to be my little helper and gopher to get stuff I've dropped or things I ask her to get for me.

She has started to color with more of a purpose. I try to have her color with something everyday...be it chalk, markers, or crayons...just like I try to make sure we get in an adequate amount of reading time as well. She has started to color with more of a purpose. If I look at a coloring book from 3 months ago, it is totally scribbles. A picture she did today will have tried to actually follow the lines more. I don't know...do coloring books inhibit creativity? I try to mix it up and also give her blank paper. Chalk and bath crayons are always on an open canvas, so I guess she gets a mix there too.

She loves to read...her favorites continue to be animal books and GOODNIGHT MOON. She has also fallen madly in love with a musical princess book that I got her at a yard sale for a quarter.

Her favorite fruits are apples, oranges, bananas, and grapes. She loves boiled potatoes, corn, peas, green beans, and broccoli. I think her favorite meat would be fried hamburger or something from the crockpot. She is also a huge fan of soups! Other favorites are mac n cheese, spaghetti, hot dish, tuna casserole, and tater tot casserole. She is very hesitant to try new things which is something we struggle with when away from home. I try to carry some snacky things for her, but like when we went to MI City last Saturday, she had eaten all the snacks because she wouldn't eat the lunch out (I ordered her a hot dog which she has eaten before but didn't touch it there.) So when we stopped for dinner she had chocolate milk and 12 saltine crackers. She refused to try any of the other food including the rice because it had bits of veggies in it. I also can't even get her to try fries but she likes potatoes???

She does love her junk food though like any good American and is a huge fan of pudding and ice cream. Josh and I recently took her to a Mexican restaurant and tried to get her to try the fried ice cream. She refused to try it even after Josh bribed her saying she would get some candy when we got home. All she ate there were the chips.

I guess from my list above she eats pretty well but sometimes when eating out it seems like there is nothing even on the kiddy menu that she will eat. She might eat the mac n cheese that they have but only if it's the regular Kraft kind, but I refuse to pay like $3 for one serving. She can have her crackers or food from our plates. I always try to make her a little plate and set it in front of her but she won't try stuff 95% of the time. Frustration. What to do? I've tried to not ask her to try stuff and just talk it up and say how good stuff tastes, which usually works, but not always.

I guess since she didn't really start eating solids until 18 months, she is really eating like she's just over a year, which seems to be on par. I finally cleaned out the cupboards and trashed the baby rice cereal she would never eat. :) I was actually was trying to think about when I started to carry snacks with me for Claire and the first time I really remember was at Holly's wedding in April...before that she just nursed. What kinds of snacks do you carry? Something diaper bag friendly?

I usually try to carry something like a Granola bar...the make HFCS free ones now more and more! Same with fruit snacks...I swear these same brands had HFCS in them in Jan. when I really started reading labels. Always a favorite are pretzels or cheerios, but I don't like to always carry such carby snacks, so I try to bring an apple but nothing else travels super-well. She won't eat yogurt drops if they get crushed. She's discovered teething biscuits kind of suck now compared to normal food. Those were a huge hit all spring, though.

She has also gotten really big into imaginative play...not just cooking me stuff or asking me to drink some tea she poured for me, but setting up her baby dolls to read to them or putting stuffed animals in the little chairs around her table and feeding them. One day she set 5 baby dolls in a row on the couch and put food in front of all of them. Then she came to get me and said, "Wanna see my babies eating?" It was so cute. I went to get the camera, but she had moved everything of course by the time I came back around the corner.

She also likes to pretend that she is Princess Fiona from SHREK. She will drape a blanket over her head and say, "I getting married!" She says, "Mommy, you the Donkey. Daddy's Shrek. I Princess Fiona." Do I sense a complex?

Anyways, we went shopping today. She was acting up so I decided to give her some Halloween MnMs in the store. She calls them "nim-nims." I opened the bag in the store. Don't worry I paid for them. But of course, being the 'shit-magnet' that I seem to be sometimes, when I ripped open the little bag, they went all over the aisle floor. So then I gave her another little fun bag which kept her happy for several aisles. :) Sometimes I feel guilty when I open stuff for her in the store, but I always make sure it's something with a set price, not something like, say grapes that are weighed. This is the confession of the mommy blogger today. Keep me in check. :) But today I saw a mom with 3 kids in one of those mega carts. Each kid had their own can of Pringles, happily munching away. Ha! I am sooo not the only one that does this. Goldfish are also another favorite to open in the store since the bag rolls down nicely and the cashier doesn't notice it's been opened while ringing it up. Is it un-kosher to open stuff in the store? I always pay for it of course. Was I rewarding her bad behavior or just trying to survive another shopping trip with a toddler in tow? I know she'll sit quietly without trying to jump out of the cart or run away if she's munching on something!

Well she's playing with a box of paperclips that she jacked out of my desk. I think it's bathtime.

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Another thought

Here's another thought...emergencies happen so rarely...would you have a doctor babysit your toddler in the event of an emergency? No...same with birth...doctors would also charge a ton more for babysitting...same with regular labors and deliverers!!!

Exploring the Homebirth Option

I've been slacking on the blog, but since my original goal was to post once/week, I guess I'm not slacking too horribly. Last Friday we headed up to my parents house for a visit and to celebrate my brother Richie's birthday. We went to the Michigan City Zoo on Saturday morning, and it ended up raining on us. Boo! :( We ended up hanging out in the monkey house for awhile, then ran to the amphibian house for some more inside time. On the way out we stopped at the gift shop to warm up! Claire convinced my parents to buy her this little kangaroo book. She loves it! She loves books that are tiny in particular!
Then we went to the Lighthouse Place mall for some shopping...well my mom and I did along with Claire of course. My dad and Richie headed to the boat. If you don't know what the boat is, it's a casino that is on a "boat." Then on the way back to Valpo we stopped at Coulter's Farm for some Fall Fun and pumpkins. Check out the photos in my Facebook albums. This site is hard to upload massive amounts of pictures to at least as far as I've figured...so I'm not reuploading. Hence, back to the slacking.

Monday night, we met with a midwife. I would really like to have a homebirth with this baby for many reasons. If one has done even a small amount of reading on this topic, one will know it is actually safer to birth at home versus in a medicalized model of child birth. Midwives will not induce, cut episiotomies, or use vacuum/forceps/etc. I also like the idea of not being separated from the infant at all. The hospital is a constant stream of separations for various reasons. I also like the idea of not being too far from Claire. I see no pros whatsoever of birthing in a hospital. If someone is scared of losing me or the baby, this is downright silly. If there would be something like a cord prolapse in early labor or placental abruption (2 of the things that would call for an emergency C-section and would be quite obvious as well), it would take just as long for them to get me from the labor/delivery floor to the surgical unit via pokey elevators as we would be able to drive there and call ahead to tell them we're on the way. And here's something that is really missing from the hospital picture...a doctor there prior to the baby crowning. A midwife KNOWS what these things are and can spot them early on. Midwives stay with you while laboring and delivering. They don't just show up to catch the baby and send you the big fat bill so they can drive their Porsche. If anything, I would actually be safer with a knowledgeable midwife who is in constant attendance, versus some flakey nurses that can't even start an IV. Yeah...did anything go right with Claire's birth?

Nope. It took 3 nurses 4 jabs to get a freaking Pit line started. Freaking incompetents. I wished my mom didn't live 3 hours away so she could've started it. She's a nurse. I've donated blood several times...even when I lived in German for my Study Abroad year and donated blood there...and everyone always said I have beautiful veins, so I don't know what their problem was. Ok, so anyways, yes, midwives would be able to spot a problem earlier on because they are actually there unlike a doctor who shows up at the 11th hour and does basically nothing. The Labor and Delivery nurses do it all!

The midwives also laid down some expectations for us since they will not work with just anybody. One thing they said was that we would have to be willing to go to the hospital because some people are so determined to stay at home that they refuse to go in when the midwives think it's needed. So this was good! They also said that they expect me to breastfeed for at least 6 weeks with the newborn since it takes a good 6 weeks for a milk supply to come in fully and be built up. Well at this point, Claire got up from playing with the toys they had, jumps in my lap, and demanded "NUMMIES! I WANT JUICY MILKY NUMMIES!" Yes, that's what she calls them lately. Juicy milky nummies. So I started nursing her, and they started laughing and clapping...it made me feel pretty good! I was like, well, I will definitely have no problem doing that since she's still nursing now at 28 months!!!!!!! Wow! She turned 28 months yesterday!

And let's see...if something would be wrong with the infant...they are fully able to revive one and carry oxygen. I honestly think that most midwives are more personally invested in the whole process since they are women who have had natural births themselves. Not that normal doctors are less caring, but these midwives have a sense of passion about them. They shared their birth stories and breastfeeding stories, since the 2 are so closely related. I have a problem with going to a man who has never had a baby come out of his vagina. Did that sound funny? Because it should. I also would like to go to a female doctor or OB who has had a vaginal birth...here's the problem...I haven't found one in the area. The female family doctors or OBs have all either (1) not had a child yet or (2) have had a C-section. I think that the women that go through this process naturally are called to be midwives. Going to someone to birth a child who has not given birth themselves is like going to a mechanic who has never driven a car or a computer repair man who doesn't own his own computer. Something is wrong with the picture in my mind. Why do OBs who are trained surgeons for special cases like twins deliver normal, healthy babies.

I had an easy time with Claire. I had no problems getting pregnant. I had some minor morning sickness, threw up a few times, but nothing major. This time, same thing...but morning sickness is supposed to be good because it means lots of growth hormones. When did the troubles start with Claire? The second we set foot into the hospital after my water broke. They sent me home saying it was false labor and my water did not break. LIES!!!!!!! It was broken....and I continued to leak like a drippy faucet until I had my OB appt. the next afternoon. Then when the doctor finally checked me...he was really surprised to find there was (1) no bag of waters and (2) no fluid/empty pockets. Dipstick! I told you so. If only this same doctor would have actually come into my room to check me instead of just releasing me the day before...only the nurse ever talked to us. And she made me mad. She told me I was leaking urine. Lady! I did my kegels. I did leak urine. It was my water breaking, and I was right.

People are downright mortified and terrified when they think of a homebirth. In all actuality, the home is the place where you are everyday. Only your own germs are there. No random weird hospital illness you can pick up on elevator buttons. Women gave birth up against trees and in log cabins forever. When did it get so freaking medicalized that women have to be carted off to the sick house, doped up, and have a baby yanked out of them? I think I was unnecessarily induced with Claire. She was a posterior presentation (came out face-up) which made me have a lot of horrible back pain/back labor. After reading about it, I was clearly in early labor since once the pit was started, she was born within 5 hours. Usually back labors and first labors are much longer than that.

Midwives don't practice medicine and haven't been trained to cut people open. But I really got the vibe from these two ladies that they don't try to play God, nor would they want to! If you are going into labor too early or if you are way overdue, you will probably have to go the hospital route.

There are 2 large studies that say it's equally safe as far as the death rate is concerned for mom and baby and WAY safer if mom doesn't want interventions leading to C-sections. The ONLY studies in the world you will find that say homebirth isn't safe are those performed by the ACOG which isn't even a medical board.

Here's a doctor who heads up a Chicago homebirth practice and always has better statistics than any hospital in the area: http://homefirst.com/

Medical Studies proving safety of homebirth:
http://www.bmj.com/cgi/content/full/330/7505/1416http://www.physorg.com/news172502894.htmlhttp://oregonstate.edu/dept/ncs/newsarch/2009/May09/midwives.html

This one summarizes and has links to other studies:
http://www.orgasmicbirth.com/blogs/debra/2009/04/home-birth-and-hospital-birth-are-equally-safe


Ok, so people who are still afraid of the homebirth route haven't read a book on the topic...or perhaps know someone who had some sort of emergency that was probably caused by the hospital in the first place. Besides...emergencies are sooo rare! I have spoken with at least 5 women in great depth about their awesome homebirths. All of them loved the prenatal care that comes with midwives. The average midwife appt. is 1 hour! That means sometimes it might be 45 minutes. That means you are actually talking to both midwives for 45 minutes to a little over an hour. They explained it would be the same as an OB appt. You pee in a cup. You get your blood pressure taken. They measure the fundus. But in addition to the OB's 2 minute "Do you have any questions?" They talk to you! They talk to you EXTENSIVELY about diet, exercise, and your personal emotional growth about the little addition growing in your belly.

They also encourage husbands to come with to the prenatals! It helps to foster understand to why choices that are being made are the ones being made. The other thing I liked was that they said just by working with a midwife doesn't promise you a homebirth because that is realistic. I know I don't want to be induced again like with Claire. Interestingly enough, for a Caucasian first time pregnancy, 15 days should be added to the EDD. Crazy, right? Well apparently different races have different amounts of times for gestation! Read towards the bottom of this link: http://www.home4birth.com/pregnancy/ I found that fascinating because it seems like EVERYBODY is induced nowadays...sometimes even before their due date. Why? Well I guess it varies from case to case...but it seems like the doctors are setting up patients for failure.

I would also like to prevent another posterior labor. That is something no regular doctor even cares about. Since Claire came out that way, I'm more likely to have another baby like that, although I've not met anyone that has had 2 babies posterior. My mom and Grandma LaVerne both had one of their babies posterior and said it was their hardest labor. I don't have anything to compare it to, yet.

Is homebirth safe? Yes. Homebirth is safe. We can't live in fear. Hospitals don't save people anyways. People save people. I know homebirth isn't for everyone and people will disapprove. But they also think it's weird that I still let Claire nurse. So bring it on. I chalk it up to lack of education in the arena. So before leaving a negative comment, make sure you read all my links...or at least mostly skimmed them.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Pacifiers? Yay or Nay?

Here is an interesting post about pacis: http://blacktating.blogspot.com/2009/10/you-are-not-pacifier.html What do you think? Yay or nay? Do they go with bottle feeding for additional sucking comfort? I was waiting 4-6 weeks with Claire to intro one, but by that time, she wouldn't ever take one! Sometimes I think it would have been super-nice to get a break once in a while, but it's kind of scary how huge the link is with pacis directly causing mastitis (a breast infection) in the mom because the baby sucks at the paci rather than the mom and never completely drains the breast tissue. Pacis (like nipple shields) also are linked to earlier weaning. I don't know...ultimately, like all these other things...are a very personal choice made by each family.