Friday, November 7, 2008

Pulling my Hair Out

Ok. So here is Claire after eating some spaghetti. She is not happy. Neither am I.

This is actually how about 90% of our meals end. She cries, screams, and is just generally unhappy.

I am pulling my hair out. Today I went to see the "darling" of the ped practice we go to. I liked him much better. I realized why. Instead of playing peek-a-boo and being all cutesey-wootsey like the regular ped (female) doctor we see, he actually was professional. He answered my questions and had EXCELLENT communication skills. Poor guy had to kind of clean up the mess the other doctor left. I basically went in not too happy.
I don't think putting Claire on cow's milk and pediasure (aka: basically sugary formula for older babies) will help her learn to eat better. Last night she choked badly on a soft spaghetti noodle. It's whole wheat spaghetti, but it's well-cooked and wasn't that long. Anyway, I asked why they weren't using separate charts. He was open to plotting her growth on the chart I brought in from WHO and was going to look into it more. When he showed me her chart again, I noticed that on the right-hand side that all these different types of formulas were advertised. I actually said "That disgusts me," and pointed to the names.
He was kind of shocked, as was I. I can't believe I said that. But I'm glad I did. LOL! He explained that these were not the "1977" charts but updated ones. I said, "Well, given all those ads on the side, it's hard not to say they are formula charts." I think I was making him squirm. Since I was already on a roll, I had the audacity to say, "Isn't that a direct violation of the WHO code?" (See my post about that.) He said it might be if he were to give me that paper to take home, but the chart is just for them to keep and use as a record. So THEN I said, "OH, so it's just subliminal messaging." Yup, I was on a roll. Then I said, "I see Pediasure is listed at the bottom of the formulas, so it's basically formula?" He said he was fine with me not using Pediasure or cow's milk, and agreed that it won't help her to eat more solids.
Today we had an off day. I honestly don't think she ate more than the 1 bite of yogurt I forced in her mouth this morning. She throws so much food, it's ridiculous. I used to think Kate from Jon and Kate Plus 8 was insane for mopping three times a day. Now I know why. Messy children. I am mopping three times a day. It's not like I do the whole floor, just the big chunks of food, etc. It seriously takes an hour from start to finish. And it's not like I get the highchair spotless. I just want the major food stuffs gone. ARGH! I just don't want our carpet to get all stained and gross. I also have forgotten to wipe down the highchair and let me tell grows mold seemingly overnight. ESPECIALLY cottage cheese. We are talking BLACK by the next morning. Yucky!
So anyway, back to the appointment...he basically had ACTUALLY read the chart! Kudos to him. I actually think some people have a better memory than others, and clearly he does! He referred to some of the other things in the chart. (Still gagging on Cheerios at 12 months.) So he asked how her choking was this week. Well she's choked 3 times this week. And I don't mean gagging. I mean choking. Red face. Can't breath. Spits up. Cries. Screams. Wants out of her highchair and to be done for that meal.
So I am considering looking into his advice more about getting some intervention of a speech-therapist or something to come and work with her. I'm not ready to be done nursing, and she definitely isn't either. But I am ready to be done nursing every 2 hours around the clock. I REALLY think she'd sleep better if she managed to eat a good solid dinner.
It's like she has to be in the perfect mood for eating. Not too hungry or full...not too tired or too awake/wanting to run around...and then the food has to be just right. And the banana she eagerly ate the past 4 mornings, might just find itself flung across the room, sliding down the glass on our back door.
I'm not too keen on the whole intervention thing, but really...what else can I be doing at this point?

1 comment:

Amy said...

Oh honey... You did a GREAT job a the doctor's office - good for you!! I am so proud of you.

Mary Grace choked a lot too. I remember one time, we were out for dinner and she was laughing - and all of a sudden she just stopped and looked at me, silent and terrified. She had choked on her own spit! I had to do back blows to get her breathing again. Terrifying.

I think there are just some kids who are anatomically prone to choking. Never had that problem with my Claire.

One thing I've read, since then, was that feeding kids pureed food actually makes them lazy and MORE prone to choking than if you started off with soft solids (the difference being a banana that's mashed vs. a banana that's cut into slices and then the slices are cut in quarter so you have 1 centimeter-ish cubes). So, as counter-intuitive as it may seem, you might try skipping the purees and going straight to soft chunks of food - aim for 1 centimeter chunks. See if she does any better.

Bonus - they're easier to pick up than soft foods like cottage cheese and purees.

Eventually MG just outgrew the choking thing. I think she was about 15-18 months old.

Second piece of assvice - get a dog. They're much easier than mopping. And if you get one that's tall enough, they'll clean up the high chair too! :)