We Know Better, So Do Better

I just can't believe doctors still do circumcisions. I can't believe parents think that their baby slept through it or it didn't hurt or they won't remember it. Good blog post with included videos about circumcision here.

Breastfeeding (and extended Breastfeeding!) is Nature's Health Plan

A couple of great blog posts appeared today. This one shows some video clips about how nursing is normal. It shows pictures of moms nursing in public as well as some great breastfeeding quotes.

And this post shows possibly the most famous breastfed baby in the world. Initially I was shy about nursing in public too, particularly church...but then I read on some forum that "Jesus was breastfed" which helped me get over that fear...and there is no better way to keep a baby or toddler quiet during the sermon than nursing!!! ;)

Dusty

I was washing Claire's hair tonight. She wanted to know why I was washing it. I said it was dirty. She asks, "My hair got dusty in it?"

Christmas Party

Pictures from the local hospital breastfeeding support group's Christmas party. Claire trying to eat her feet:

Claire with Catrece:

My Favorite Kind of Day

My favorite kind of day is a day like today. Claire slept until 8:45 and woke up happy. That meant that I got to sleep that long too! Then I got to lay in bed a little while longer while she had what I call "wake-up" nummies. I got dinner going in the crock pot since we would be gone all day.

I made brats. It's super easy. I use a package of 5. I used a bag of the sauerkraut that you can get in the meat case. Then I chopped about 6 potatoes and 3 apples. The secret is in the apples. The apples reduce the bitterness of the kraut. The potatoes also suck up some of the juice from the meat and kraut, so they taste really good and unique. So things don't get too dry from cooking all day in the crockpot, I added 1 cup of 100% apple juice. I didn't need any other seasons or spices. As an afterthought, I could have added some onion, but I forgot. Bacon is also very good in kraut, but leftover bacon doesn't last very long in our fridge. :) NOM NOM NOM! Josh is hilarious. I made french toast and bacon one night this week and Josh was telling Claire that the piggy made the bacon for her. I don't want to be the one to tell her how...

So Claire played with Play-doh while I got the Crock Pot going. Then we headed out to see our neighbor Olivia's dance recital. She was a solider in the Nutcracker. *Note to self* pay for a ticket for Claire next time, so she doesn't have to sit on my lap the whole time. I swear that those HS auditorium seating styles are worse than airplane seating. *Note to self* don't sign up Claire for dance until she is at least 5 as the 3 and 4 year olds dancing...well...sucked. No offense to anyone.

We actually ended up ducking out slightly early which was great to beat the massive parking lot exodus after any big event, but we were heading to a birthday party. This was great, as Claire wouldn't be taking a nap today, and she didn't! She had fun at the party and ate all the icing of a cupcake. I can't get her to eat cake. Not that I want her to eat cake. I can't get her to try coke or fries either.

Some toddlers live on french fries alone and she's never had one, which is funny because she loves potatoes and salty foods like chips and pretzels. Oh well, she'll discover them soon enough. I'm not going to encourage that she tries them. She will try what she wants. The other day I was having her help me scoop cookies out. I didn't tell her she could try one, and she just grabbed a scooped cookie and jammed it in her mouth. She goes, "MMM. This is delicious." Of course, and full of raw eggs! ACK! Oh well, she ate 3 raw ones and survived just fine.

So at the party I tried to get her to go play in the playroom with the other kids, but if I left her alone, then she would follow me. I guess that's a good thing, but it would be nice to have some freedom...

So then when we got home, I did try to get her to take a really really late afternoon nap, but she wasn't at all acting tired. Josh had his friend Dave over since he is moving, so she wanted to go investigate this visitor and show him all sorts of her tricks and toys. Her favorite is to show people how fast she can run in a circle. Why? I don't know...but then she wants to get books or toys and say, "Here, see my Disney Princess book." And she will say it over and over until the person she is trying to talk to her acknowledges her. I didn't force the nap since she wasn't cranky, and I knew she'd go to bed early.

I tried to get her to try some brat, kraut, taters to her for dinner, but she shoved it away and goes, "NOOOOO WANT THIS." LOL. I'm a bad German. I've never served it to her before. I'm not a huge huge fan of brats/kraut, but once in awhile, like in the winter, it's really good in the crockpot. So she got to eat a slice of bread and some leftover "gobi" which is how she says spaghetti. Or sometimes she'll call it "spagh-gobi."

Is that bad to heat up different food for her? I think kraut is pretty sour, so I did. Plus we had company, and I didn't want to deal with a fit. She is super picky about presentation and food. She wants her sandwiches cut in half (so the sandwich looks like 2 triangles). Her food pickiness should be a separate post, though.

While we were talking, I said something that prompted the comment, "That's what she said." If you don't know what a TWSS comment is, it's basically a one-size fits all comment to add sexual overtones to practically anything in conversation. Totally inappropriate for saying around a 2 year old. So then, after the comment "That's what she said," and a slight pause, Claire piped up, "That's what your mom said." It was too funny and too perfectly timed. And I don't think we've ever said that phrase, so she just made it up, which is even funnier.

Oh, and I figured out where she got the "Kidding" phrase from the other day. It's in the book, Everyone Poops which she of course, is fascinated with reading. It says, "One-humped camels make 1-humped poops, and 2 humped camels make 2-humped poops. Only kidding!"

So then it was 7:30 and time for bath and bed. Gloriousness is on nights where she falls asleep almost instantly...like less than 10 minutes, which is pretty typical on no-nap days. Then I can pick up around the house, and make 2 more pans of cookies from the cookie dough we made cookies with earlier in the week. Hot cookies just can't be beat. And that's my favorite kind of day. One that involves lots of food, fun, and friends!

Claire's ABCs

Claire's own version of the ABCs (2 years, 4 months) She enjoys singing her own version of the ABCs...can get to H, then says KLMNOP and WXYZ and the ending right. She has also been saying poop and pee on the videos a lot so that is frustrating. Check out the video here:

Dentist Visit

This morning, Claire and I had our standard 6 month check-ups at the Dentist. I've taken her with me several times already. She's been at about 12, 18, and 24 months. And now today! She doesn't have any of her 2 year-old molars, and they aren't peeking though at all. I guess most kids have them already, but the dentist said that it's a good thing. It's easy to take care of teeth that aren't through the gums yet. :) This means she'll probably be getting her set of permanent teeth closer to 7 vs. 6 like most kids. I am not looking forward to any fussy days/nights when those 4 teeth cut through the gums, but at least now she can tell me if her mouth or teeth hurt.

She was really good and sat on my lap or played on a chair next to me while I got my teeth cleaned. Then the dentist checked my teeth and hers. I really like our dentist and they let her pick if she wanted to sit in the chair alone or have me hold her. Of course she wanted me to hold her. So they laid the chair back with her head on my shoulder, and she actually opened her mouth and totally cooperated. I was actually pretty surprised given our encounter with being afraid of Santa at the mall this past Saturday. But I guess it was sort of different and maybe she remembers the other visits.

When we go back in 6 months they said she'll be ready for her first cleaning at 3! Sometimes it depends on the cooperation level of the kid, but I think she'll be ready and has never minded when I brush/floss her teeth. She does have some "minor staining" since she loves that dark purple natural grape juice, but it's nothing to worry about. So we are both cavity free. Crazy that by our next visit I'll have another little boy to bring along! ACK! The hygienist always says that she's seen more plaque on 3 year olds when she does my teeth, but I think she must say that to everyone, because she says it every time I'm there.

She was excited to pick out a Hello Kitty sticker and a nice new orange crayon toothbrush. It's awesome that kids can get so excited about the smallest things. I celebrated my cavity free visit by treating myself to a car wash on this sunny day.

Babies don't need Baby Food

That's right. Babies don't need that squashed up mashed up jarred crap and you don't have to waste your time making "homemade" crap for them: http://ecochildsplay.com/2009/03/13/baby-essentials-that-arent-part-7-baby-food/
If they do need it, they are probably getting solids too early. Basically babies started needing solids super early back when formula was deplete of the things baby needed. But times haven't changed much in that the baby food marketing is still very aggressive.

I bought a couple jars of baby food twice with Claire because that's what I was "supposed to do, right?" and then I threw it away because she wouldn't eat it. The only thing I did buy was teething biscuits and rice crackers but again...not really till about 18 months and only for a few months. Amazingly, she clicked literally overnight at not quite 18 months and just started eating whatever was on my plate for the most part. She is still really picky and is hesitant to try new things. I wonder what baby boy will be like. I can tell you one thing...he's getting nothing until AT LEAST 6 months and probably nothing really until he is crawling and has a couple teeth because those are the better indicators...not just a magical 6 month date.

I feel the slacking coming on

So I've been pretty good about posting lately...I feel some major slacking coming on, however. LOL! It usually comes and goes in spurts. But for today, I have 3 little stories about Claire to share.

1. We were at Wal-Mart today. I was buying tp. Claire noticed the bears on the package and got excited! She asked, "Mommy, what that for?" I said it was toilet paper. And recognizing now what it was, just inside a plastic wrapper, she excitedly and very loudly, yelled, "OH! THAT FOR WIPING PEOPLES CROTCHES." Dear Lord. Luckily the aisle was empty, but I'm sure that the staff in the Sporting Goods heard her.

2. I was buying a package of hamburger meat. Claire goes, "I NO LIKE MEAT." This was wrong because she loves hamburger meat. I said, Claire, you like this when it's cooked, it turns brown and is HAMBURGER MEAT. So she laughed and goes, "I kidding." I don't know where she got that, I don't exactly make it a point to kid around with my 2 year-old.

3. Yesterday, I had to take my ring to the jewelry store because I moved some heavy boxes and managed to bend it. So they have a bunch of Grandfather Clocks in there. Claire got so excited when she saw them. She started singing, "Hickory Dickory Dock." Then she goes "WHERE MOUSEY GO?" and started looking for a mouse in all of the clocks. Too cute!

2 years & 4 months Update

Claire has been saying a lot of new things lately and picking up on more than I want her to. I guess one thing is for sure. Having a talking toddler this age really makes me aware of what I say a lot. Apparently I saw "crap" and "retarded" a lot. And I do mean A LOT because she says it "A LOT." She also says "Oh my God." So we've been trying to teach her "Oh my goodness" instead and silly for "retarded."

Oh, and she can open doors. CRAP! She just started doing this in the past week. Joshua actually showed her. I was getting sick of her getting stuck in a room and freaking out. It does take her some effort to open them and she is usually very noisy. She doesn't like going into dark rooms, so it's nice that our light switches are still too tall for her to reach. She can reach the lights at my parents house, however. So I'm a little hesitant about our next visit home.

However, she really does mind well and listen. We can have the box of tissue on the coffee table again, and she won't pull them all out! YAY! We have breakable Christmas ornaments on the trees, and she doesn't touch them! If we are out and about and there is a tree like at a store or the library, she will tell me what to do. It's pretty hilarious. "Mommy, no touching those. Those glass. You break them! No touching! Just look!!"

She has discovered the joy of gum ball machines. She calls them "Gumble Balls" which I think is funny because she can say gum ball when I correct her, but insists on gumble balls. Apparently it's much more fun.

She will say "Bless You" or "Gesundheit" when someone sneezes. When she sneezes, instead of saying "Bless Me" she says "Gesundheit me," which is just too darn cute to correct.

Apparently I say "correct" and "fine" a lot. She will say those and it just sounds really goofy coming out of her mouth.

Yesterday we saw Disney's The Princess and the Frog movie which she loved. It's the first time we've been to a movie since she was 12 months old. Ha...we saw the Batman move The Dark Night. We don't go to movies very often anymore. LOL! Anyways, the Princess in that movie is called Princess Tiana. She keeps calling her "Princess Ti-Indiana." I don't get why she is lengthening some words and making them longer than they are.

Oh my. I just jinxed myself. Saying she never touches the ornaments that have been hanging up for over 2 weeks...and she just walked in playing with a Hallmark ornament shaped like an ice cream cone pretending to eat it. "Mmm. This ice cream cone so delicious." I'm like crap...can't write about anything...dang kids will be sure to prove you wrong. Can she read my mind? HOW DID SHE KNOW. She says stuff tastes "delicious" and "glorious." Josh says "glorious" a lot and it's just so funny when she says it.

And speaking of trouble, she knows when she's in trouble. This morning, she jacked a candy cane off the tree. Except I was loading the dishwasher and didn't know it. I just heard some grunting and plastic noises and I almost *knew* that it sounded like the plastic cellophane of a candy cane wrapper, but I was like totally doubting it...no. Well, sure enough, she came into the kitchen, SO SO PROUD of herself. She goes, "LOOK WHAT I FOUND!" She had broken the crook off and managed to get it out and was eating it. That requires talent. Candy cane wrappers are freaking hard to remove! I go, "Where did you get that?" and she sensed she was in trouble. So she goes, "I don't know. I don't remember." Right. So I asked her to show me and she showed me the spot on the tree where she got it off. Dang it. Yesterday we saw Santa at the mall after the movie, and she got a candy cane from him, so she made the connection. Before that she didn't "know" what a candy cane was, although she loves peppermint circle candies.

Speaking of hard candy, she loved the movie popcorn...another choking hazard, I know, but seriously...I think the advice for the age on popcorn and hotdogs is something like 6. She's got a good gag reflex. :) I just looked up some choking hazard foods. Apparently, I'm a major violator. LOL. I don't always cut up her grapes and apples anymore. I've also given her nuts. Yikes. Maybe I should cut back? Or am I just being paranoid. I know the Heimlich maneuver on toddlers. Finger sweep time... I do like this advice that NO SOLID FOOD should be given to an infant before 6 months. But people interpret this as something like the Gerber Stage 3 with "chunks." No really, solids are anything, including rice cereal and purees! Claire ate nothing before about 18 months...and I do mean nothing other than my milk. I joke that candy was her first solid. She snitched it off the table at Holly's bridal shower last Jan. and has never turned back.

Other funny/cute things that Claire says a lot now, "Hmm, let's see" and "Actually." And the questions, oh the questions, "What are we gonna do today? What're gonnna do tomorrow? Where Daddy at? It 5 o'clock now? Daddy working now? What Daddy doing at work today? We go eat lunch with Daddy today?" (we try to a couple times a month). And in the car, "Where are we? Where're going? What that? Lookie!" She loves all the Christmas decorations if it's dark out, especially inflatables. I personally would never have an inflatable, but there seem to be a lot around town. She wants to know everyone's name.

We were at the bank and she pointed at the bank teller and asked me, "What him name?" Amazing, he understood and said "My name's Mike." And she was thrilled that he understood. So she goes, "OOOH! Hi Mike! Mr. Bank Guy." I tell her people's names are whatever their jobs are. LOL. So now everytime we go to the bank, they laugh because she called him "Mr. Bank Guy." I suppose I need to work on my proper terms too, like, um, teller?

I also love the assumptions that she has started to verbalize. Like when we were fingerpainting, she goes, "Daddy want to fingerpaint." I told her Daddy was working right now and couldn't fingerpaint with us. So she goes, "Daddy have no fun." That cracked me up.

Another thing along with the washer/dryer, I've figured out that if I've moved some stuff that was on the side of the machine, she can actually start the machine after we load it. Once in awhile she doesn't want to help. She'll say something like "You can do it Mommy!" LOL! Hopefully, I'll have her fully running the laundry running through by April (yeah right...)!!!

She is exceptionally good with names/faces, as I am. Hey, I absolutely suck with math and figures, but give me a set of 150 students, and I will have all of their first/last names memorized with correct spellings, including my class that had 5 girls with the same name my last year teaching before I went on maternity leave (Katelyn, Katelynn, Catelyn, Caitlin, and Caytlin). Ahh yes, that was fun. I usually impressed the pants off of my students by knowing all their names before any other teacher, which I do like to brag about because I had 99.9% of the time had previously no other way of knowing these kids' names. Now, I will admit my math skills lack, and I always made mistakes on things like when I graded papers. So to remedy this, I told them to always double check their papers and if they found a math error, it would obviously be corrected, plus a bonus point for my mistake. OOOH. This got them to actually look at their papers instead of chucking them right in the trash. But back to Claire, she remembers everyone's name and all those dang character names from books/shows. It amazes me. And she has started asking for friends to come over and play. "I have friend come play today?" It's so cute.

Josh is watching the football game right now, and I'm hearing my fair share of "OH CRAPS" as Claire chimes in along with Daddy. Her other favorite is "Pwnt!!!" check out the meaning of that here.

As far as other developments, we've started leaving the baby gate to the stairs down. We took down the one by the TV that was blocking off all the DVDs and rock band drum set stuff. She no longer finds great joy in emptying books/DVDs off a shelf. I thought that stage would never end. She kept climbing up the back of the loveseat and over to get back there. I'd be putting laundry or something away and all of a sudden, I'd hear her beating on the drumset, so I realized she'd gotten back there. I've also started pulling out all those mother-effing outlet plug covers. I don't know why I ever put them in. She never once was interested in the outlets. Apparently it's just something you think you need, but you don't. Who knows? I'm having a boy in April. He may think it's great fun to stick things in the outlets. Ack.

Well, I better stop my form of 'productive procrastination' and start folding some dang laundry.

My Facebook

Claire has her own "Facebook." I don't know where she comes up with this stuff. If she asks what I'm doing or reading on the computer sometimes I'll say Facebook, so this is what she came up with. Watch the video here:

Toddler Nursing

I just ran across a great article about toddler nursing. Here is my favorite line from the article: "Humans are the only mammals that don't let their offspring feed to term. I can't deny that I like to normalise breastfeeding in a world that sees it as increasingly alien..." I really enjoyed this article and it makes me want to let Claire nurse on demand when out and about instead of offering her a sippy, snacks, or snuggles. Nursing is just so much simpler! Who needs to haul along sippy cups when you've got 2 perfectly good sippy boobs!?! It mentioned something about the age of weaning should being closer to 6! "I've learnt that the natural age of weaning is closer to six years – when the first permanent molars appear – than six months."

I also really liked this comment, "No matter how hard I found breastfeeding, however, I couldn't stop, for two reasons. The more knowledgeable I became, the more vital I knew sustained breastfeeding to be. And, second, because it is obvious how much breastfeeding means to my daughter."

Freaking Annoying Cell Phone Habits

FIRST: Annoying answering habits:

1. Answering your phone when you can't talk for more than 1 minute because you're doing something else. Someone actually invented something to solve this problem. It's called VOICEMAIL. USE IT!
2. Answering your phone during a movie, concert, or otherwise interactive situation where you are expected to NOT be on a phone. This includes while paying for goods or services. It's rude to both parties. Again...voicemail was invented for this issue.
3. Answering your phone while doing something extremely loud...you know, using power tools, or vacuuming are good examples of when to let your call go to voicemail.
4. Answering your phone when talking to someone else. Nobody wants to be on hold. Hold should have never been invented. It sucks for everyone.
5. Answering your phone while in a public restroom. Nobody wants to hear flushing while they talk to you. And nobody wants to hear your stall call while they are going potty. It's a little creepy to hear a one-way conversation in an otherwise quiet restroom.
6. Answering your phone while waiting in line at the grocery store because you're expected to um, interact with the cashier. Besides, you might want to pay attention and make sure you don't get double charged for something. Oh, and that beeping of the scanned items is very annoying to hear.
7. Answering your phone while watching TV or listening to music loudly. Either let it go to voicemail OR hit pause. Don't do both.
8. Answering your phone while eating. Listening to someone chew while amplified over the phone is just downright disgusting.
9. Answering your phone and then 3-way connecting the call to someone else without asking. Maybe we don't want to talk to that person right now or just had a quick question for the person that we actually called...not the other person.
10. Answering your phone in your own bathroom and and then flushing the potty. Seriously. If you have to answer your phone now, then don't flush the potty. I don't care how close you are. I don't want to know that you just crapped or peed. And I'm gonna laugh if you ever accidently drop your phone in the dirty crapper water.
11. Answering your phone in the car. Um, driving requires some attention. I don't want to be responsible for your next car accident. Plus it's freaking annoying to other drivers and can even be fined in some areas. HANG UP AND DRIVE.
12. Don't answer a landline while on a cell phone or vice-versa. It's like holding. Let the other one go to voicemail. You can't be on 2 lines at once. It's just rude to both people and frustrating to yourself when you try and decide who you want to talk to more.
13. Don't answer an unknown number when you're talking to me. That's like beyond retarded. That's like leaving a $12 IMAX movie to go home and check your email to read the SPAM that you get.
14. Don't answer a survey. What a waste of freaking time. No wonder you have to keep close tabs on minutes.
15. Don't answer your phone while at a restaurant, even if your food isn't there yet. The only place that is ok is a place like McDs where you pay for the food at the counter and get it yourself.

NOW: Annoying calling habits:

1. Don't call me for directions to my house on the way to an event. I'm likely busy getting things ready or already have other company here. Ok, if it's a true emergency, fine. But plan ahead. Get online and look up directions and print them out if you still live in the dinosaur age...better yet...get a GPS. Again, inventions were invented for a reason.
2. Don't call me for the phone number or address to where you are going. What the crap. I have a life. Just because I *might* be home doesn't mean I want to look things up for you. There is actually a service that will do this for you for a small fee. It's called...ready for this...INFORMATION! But...again...if you are cheap, plan ahead and http://www.justfuckinggoogleit.com/. OR...if you have a GPS...it will list theses these things. There are also these little electronic handheld thingys that have the Internet that will come right along with you wherever you go. OPTIONS ARE ENDLESS.
3. Don't call me while you are looking at refrigerators and ask me to research them for you while you are at the store. You've got to be beyond kidding me. This is part of doing your homework. This a MAJOR appliance. One that YOU NEED TO DO YOUR OWN HOMEWORK ON!!!
4. Don't call me back without checking your freaking voicemail. It just makes you look stupid. I don't care if it wastes your minutes.
5. Check your voicemails daily. Again, stupid-looking.
6. Respond to your voicemails within 24 hours. Again, stupid and/or rude-looking...falls on YOU!
7. Delete your old voicemails. I can't believe how many people I've called who have full Voicemail boxes. Seriously. It takes 2 seconds to delete them. On the other hand, it's a pretty good indicator that I better not leave you one.
8. Don't complain that I never call you because when I do call you, you manage to somehow violate at least one of the above mentioned rules in a least every phone call.
9. Don't pass the phone off to someone else in the room without asking. If I wanted to call that person, well, I would've called that person.
10. Don't call me while you are waiting in line at the grocery store. Your fellow shoppers don't want to hear you talking while in line. We've discussed this before. Call when you have some quality time to spend chatting.
11. Don't get mad when you don't leave a voicemail and you don't get an instant call back. Just because there is a missed call from you, that doesn't mean I am going to instantly call you back. I probably haven't even missed my phone. It's probably out in my car, allowing the voicemail to pick up call after call. I will listen to my 5 voicemails and respond to those first. IF I even look at the missed calls, I may or may not get around to returning your mystery call about something you forgot about why you were calling anyways.
12. Don't call me to look up random facts. I don't care what you want to know. Use http://www.chacha.com/
13. Don't call me to go turn on the TV to watch a certain movie or show. I don't give a rat's ass what you are watching. It's not going to be on the same channel anyways.
14. Don't call me while the person next to you is on the phone. Hearing another conversation is annoying.
15. Calling me then talking to another person in the same room with you without saying "hang on" It's confusing. And rude.
16. Calling me and then not letting me go after and adequate conversation length. Once someone hints they need to "go" then it's only polite to let them go within about a minute of said hint. Continuing to try and talk to me when I've got a screaming toddler is frustrating for everyone involved, and I will hang up the phone on you.
17. Only ever calling me for to look up something online for you. I'm glad you know I've got the Internet. But you could at least call and chit chat once in awhile, too. Seriously, a 3 minute phone call could fill me in a lot about your life.
18. Calling me to tell me to check my email or snail mail box. I check those. Daily. Email I check AT LEAST 3 times a day...morning, noon, and night. Just because you only check your email...weekly, doesn't mean I do.
19. Calling me to tell me you texted me. I don't have texting. Either call me or email me. Send me a letter in the snail mail if you can't pay your phone or Internet bill this month. A stamp is only 42 cents. Steal some change out of a fountain if needed.
20. Calling to ask about a text you sent me. I don't have texting. Texting is gay. I hate texting. I can't type on a little tiny keypad to save my life. I don't want to see your stupid pictures and forwards instantly on my hip. They can wait to go to my inbox where I will delete your stupid Obama and other forwards without opening or otherwise looking at them if they have FW: in the subject line. If it's not worth a full phone call or a full email, it's probably not worth my time. Or definitely.
21. Calling and leaving extra long voicemail messages. I have set my voicemail time limit to one minute.
22. Don't call and "finish" what you were going to say on another voicemail. I will call you back. Maybe. If you don't piss me off too much.
23. Don't call me and read something to my voicemail. I don't want to hear it.
24. Don't call me and read me Bible passages to my voicemail. I have a Bible. If I want to read it, I will.
25. Don't call me and read something to me that you found in German. Unless you are my Dad or a native speaker...then your German sucks. I don't want to hear it. And even then, see 23.
26. Don't call me and call me and call me. LEAVE A VOICEMAIL. I WILL CALL YOU BACK WHEN I GET BACK TO MY PHONE.
27. Ask where I was. Maybe I was taking a shower. Maybe I was sleeping. Maybe it's none of your beeswax. Maybe I was in a public restroom or checking out at the store or I just didn't hear my phone ring. Maybe I was at the bar getting drunk because I want a FAS baby (NOT!) Just because "I stay at home" does not mean I actually sit at home on my couch all day and answer my phone instantly. If I want to tell you, I will.
28. Don't call me and leave me voicemails between the hours of midnight and six AM. You should be asleep. NOT on the phone. I turn my phone off, but most calls during these hours are never productive and usually involve mind-altering substances.
29. Don't call me for someone else's address or email address or my own. Really. Take 2 seconds and look it up for your freaking self.
30. Don't call me to edit your paper/resume/project that is due in 30 minutes. Really. I'd love to read your stuff and laugh at all your grammatical errors, but I need a little more time, especially if you want some constructive feedback.
31. Don't call me only when you need something. I've already figured those people out. I have their numbers in my phone, not because I'm going to call them, but just so I can see when they call and then I hit "Ignore."
32. Don't call me and ask what I'm doing tomorrow. I know you'll want me to do something for you, so just tell me and then I'll decide what I'm doing tomorrow...aka helping you out or sticking to my original plan.
33. Don't call me to babysit for your kid plus 5 other random kids I've never watched before 2 hours before you need me. I'm going to say no and wonder why you thought I would watch them.
34. Don't call me when I'm in a bad mood, like right now. I'll probably let it go to voicemail so I don't get pissy and unnecessarily irritate you in the process.
35. Don't only ever call me while you're in the car because it's not safe and because you probably really don't have time to chat anyways.
36. Don't put me on speaker phone ever. At best, speaker phone completely beyond sucks. Nobody can hear anything. If you don't have time to chat, please be polite enough to let me know.
37. Don't complain that I don't have a landline or have texting blocked. I really don't care that this fact might piss you off. I might actually giggle about the fact that it pisses you off.
38. Don't call me to ask me my own address. Don't be so freaking lazy. I know you have it. Keep yourself organized to freaking know where it is.
39. Don't call me and tell me some long website address. I'm not going to go look it up. I'm not going to probably even listen to my entire voicemail message. Email it to me. Duh. And even then I'm probably just going to delete it. :)
40. Please don't call me ask my husband computer questions. He has email. He doesn't want to help you. But neither do I. Your computer probably sucks. You need to stop going to crappy porno sites. Email him your questions, don't call me about them. It makes me want to stab you and drink your blood when you ask about computer questions. Nom, nom, nom! I don't call you for computer help.
41. Don't call my husband's work Blackberry and leave a message. He didn't stutter on his message. (Go ahead for those of you that have never called. Call it and get a giggle out of it.) But don't leave a message. Either me or one of his coworkers will be deleting your message that nobody is going to hear. And we are just going to think you're even stupider for leaving a message. And don't leave a message to be funny, because the messages were just deleted today and probably won't even be acknowledged (ahem, deleted) for a few more months.

The End.

Disclaimer: All of the above are based on actual observations or personal experiences. If you think something is directed at you, it probably is. :) Ask me, I will tell you because I'm cool like that! But don't feel bad if you think something is directed at you because most of these things have been violated by several people several times. I don't claim to have perfect manners or perfect phone manners, but I don't talk while driving or crapping or checking out at Wal-Mart. I was prompted to write this particular post when I called my mom and she answered while AT A CHRISTMAS CONCERT. SERIOUSLY! Ok, now I know that when Claire is older, I'll probably want to answer her every call just in case it's an emergency. But I've also called my Dad probably at least 2 times while he was at the movies. Seriously. LOL. If it's a true emergency then I should be calling 911.

I'm going to bed. NARGH!

Blocks!

I ordered Claire some wooden blocks for Christmas before I saw this post. Now I'm doubly excited about her gift!

Duggars had premature baby!

The Duggars had their 19th baby, 3 months early...she was only 25 weeks prego. Holy Carp...that would be like me having this boy next week. Read more here.

Sesame Street Potty Chart

Claire has been doing great asking to go potty. Check out her sticker chart. The sticker chart came in a coloring book about Elmo learning to use the potty that her friend Pierce gave to her for her 2nd birthday. I'm glad I finally got it out. She loves picking what sticker she gets to put on the chart.

Advent Calendar

Claire is in love with her Advent Calendar. She wants to carry it around and play with the little doors. She can't open any new doors, yet...hasn't figured that out. I have to open them for her, so that works out well.
I let her pick out which one she wanted, and of course she picked the one with baby Jesus. She loves babies, like most toddlers.

St. Nicholas Shoes Craft

Claire made St. Nick shoes for the first time. Well, she colored them and "helped" me tape them together.
She was so excited to have made her own shoes and carried them around all day.

She loves coloring!!!

I think she is going to be right-handed, but sometimes she will use her left.

Finger Painting Christmas Shapes

Claire had so so so much fun finger-painting! I traced the Christmas shapes with cookie cutters, then she painted them with finger paint. Oh, and I added some glitter! I.love.glitter=true!
Well, the one on the left, she colored, but the rest were finger-painted.

Now we have all these cute shapes, and I'm not sure what to do with them! Maybe I'll stick a string through them and hang them on the tree?

She kept saying "Oooh! Squishy!!!"

I kept her in her jammies so no clothes would be stained, and I put a huge bib on her too.

Feeling Better...Not so pissed...

Well, I feel better now after ranting about my silly OB appt. today. And thank you, Amy, for pointing an obvious fact that I didn't seem to connect at the time. My boy is MEASURING 2 weeks EARLY, yet she is claiming that nursing while pregnant could some how cause the baby not to grow. CAN'T BE BOTH!!!

Hello, the milk supply would dry up first...and I am kind of waiting to see if this happens. But Claire always asks for milky nummies. I ask her if milk is coming out, and she always says YES. Once in awhile in the evening while nursing to sleep she will say it's "All gone." So I know she's drained things for a moment.

So this evening Claire and I hit up the Hancock Breastfeeding Group for their Christmas party. It was a complete blast and all the little kiddies and nurslings were dressed super-duper cute!!! And there was food...and it was super yummy!

I talked to the LC (lactation consultant) and told her Dr. N. had advised me not to nurse. And guess what? She said that I wasn't the first mom that had told her that. Seriously. I want to educate this silly OB. I'd like to find a really good, recent article that supports nursing during pregnancy to give her...but is there even a point?

She is an OB. I asked if she has kids. Nope. So obviously she's never nursed any which pretty much says it all. If you want someone to deliver your kid who has had a good nursing experience I suppose you'd have to go more the midwife route.

And it was a good night since Claire went right to sleep after running around and playing with other kids almost all day!!!

Silly, Silly OB.

I just got back from my OB appt. I am supposed to be 22 weeks, but baby boy is measuring 24 weeks. I HATE THE OBs. At my last visit, 4 weeks ago, I met with Dr. S. who already was mentioning induction because I was measuring big. GOOD GRIEF! Can we at least wait until APRIL to start mentioning inductions.

THIS TIME, I left ticked again, because I happened to mention I was still nursing. I didn't meant to. Really. I know you're not "supposed to breastfeed past 12 months." (Please not the dripping sarcasm.) The reason I'm ticked was because the silly OB, Dr. N, said "You're still nursing while you're pregnant?" Yup. "You're really not supposed to." Oh really? "There is a concern about the baby getting enough nutrients." Really.

So guess what I said. I said she could jot down on her little chart that she informed me of that, but I've read otherwise and plan on continuing. Ha. I felt her bristle a little at this point. She's like, well, legally we have to inform you to stop nursing in case the baby inside you isn't growing enough.

WHAT. THE. HELL.

Women have tandem nursed for THOUSANDS OF YEARS. I am beyond pissed right now.

I said I was in La Leche League. I dropped that "L bomb" ha. And I have read otherwise. I turned out fine and my older brother David nursed while my mom was pregnant with me...and for 9 more months alongside me!!! GEEZ!!!

ME.ANGRY=TRUE!

So then I got all bitchy. Yes I did. I said I would like to see what she had read otherwise. That caught her off guard. I asked where she had read that. Couldn't really remember. MAYBE BECAUSE THAT'S A LOT OF SHIT. Pardon my French.

Anyways, baby boy was fine. Did the normal pee in a cup, let them take my blood pressure, etc. Sometimes they want to take it twice because it tends to run low. I swear it's the fish oil vitamins I've been taking daily since trying to get pregnant with Claire.

His heart beat was strong and measured at 150. (If you follow old wives's tales, girls are supposed to have a higher heart beat, so that was wrong.)

UGH. WHY AM I SO ANGRY.

I am so mad that the back of my neck feels hot.

At least Claire was GREAT at the neighbors. She was a perfect angel and didn't hit over a toy once. And didn't cry when I left or when she realized I'd left!!! She loves playing with Christopher since they are about the same age. He just turned 2 mid-November, so about 3ish months apart...

I've got frozen pizza in the oven. I'm too mad to make dinner. I had to blog instead. ;)

WHY AM I SO PISSED?

BECAUSE I'M RIGHT?

Oh, and she also mentioned the whole contraction crap from nipple stimulation but that is crap too because contractions without dilation is fine!

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

First time Finger Painting

I finally got around to finger painting with Claire and it was a blast. Check out our video here:

Christmas Mittens

This is a craft we made at story time. I thought it was cute. It would be even cuter to make gloves and trace their little hands for the gloves. All she did for this was add Christmas stickers, but she had a blast! Notice she even put the paper backing on one of them. She even threaded the pipe cleaner through herself, I just helped twist it together!

The Making of the Gingerbread House

So these are gonna go in reverse since that's the way Blogger likes to upload things. Here is our finished house! Slightly sloppy by my old definitions, but absolutely perfect with a 2 year-old helping!

You'll notice that Claire was a huge fan of this craft project. Her hands are in her mouth on several photos. She loved the icing.
I would actually put the icing on the house and then she would stick the candies on. And then I kept noticing she would just stick her finger in the icing so she could eat it.

Her eyes are closed in pure bliss:

What's not to love? Sugary treats right after breakfast while still wearing Sponge Bob jammies. I hate Sponge Bob btw. But for $3 clearance jammies at Wal-Mart...you stop caring and just buy them. Stuff at the Goodwill or Resale stores costs more!

YUMMY! I put out all these different bowls for the candies. Next year...I won't be so organized. It's all just gonna get mixed up anyways!

She got the hang of this right away and had a blast sticking all the candies on...in between sticking some in her mouth!

Ahh...standing in the chair. This is why I like to keep her strapped in the booster seat or high chair. Then she can't get out!

I first told her we were gonna put the candy on the house and she dumped a whole bowl right on to it. :)

It only took about 5 minutes to ice the house together. The roof was broken in the box, but nothing a little icing didn't fix!

Stay tuned for more fun Christmas crap, err...crafts...that we've been making!

Ring-Around-The-Rosie

Claire is in love with Ring-Around-The-Rosie. SHE LOVES IT. She doesn't just fall down at the end. She does a belly-flop-dive onto the ground at the end. I don't know why it's so fun, but she wants to sing it like this "Ring around the Rosie! ASHES! FALL DOWN!" so she can hurry up and get to the falling down part of things.

My New Favorite Music Video

Check out this great little music video clip set to Beyonce:

Playing with Play-Doh

What is it with 2 year-olds and Play-Doh? It's great! It will keep her busy for at least a solid 15 minutes. And that's a long time in the Toddler world. Sometimes she will sit and play with it for up to an HOUR before she asks to get down. Daddy actually took these pictures, so I give him credit. He actually got her looking and smiling here!!!!
This is the set she got on Sunday, and she is already having a blast mixing the colors. That's the whole fun of it!

I like to let her play with it every day because 1) I know it's a good way to keep her busy without having to watch her really closely and 2) It's great for working on her strength in her little fingers and hands with all the ripping, pulling, and smashing!

Daddy made this snake and she decorated it. I was taking a glorious Sunday afternoon nap. Alone. :) No, I tried to get Claire down for 30 minutes, but she didn't want to sleep. So she got to go play while I got to sleep. I probably should've tried longer, but I kept dozing off and she kept waking me up...and I knew Daddy was home. So around 6pm Claire crawled into my lap to nurse. Josh and I were watching a movie about ... something ... it was that memorable...what was it...that big hippie fest in the NY area that drew so many people....WOODSTOCK....anyways, suddenly I realized she wasn't nursing, but she hadn't moved for some time. She totally had fallen asleep. Like OUT. So we enjoyed the movie while she slept on my lap for a bit. Love that she can still fall asleep nursing like that. Of course...she didn't fall asleep nursing in the bed earlier, so it's not always a given anymore. Just when she's super tired!

Doesn't she look so big sitting in one of the big chairs and not her booster or high chair?

It's about time she got some new Play-Doh. Her other ones were getting really dried out and crusty from her playing with them so much! I could MAKE some Play-Doh, but that requires, you know...effort. LOL! Actually, I'll probably make some with her this winter when it's cold and staying inside and still having fun requires some thoughtfulness to make things fun.

She loves to help me cook. Her new thing is wanting to help me put eggs on to boil for breakfast. She is learning the art of GENTLY putting them into the pot, and not dropping them. There is always one that gets a crack and leaks little egg bits all over the pot. Ahh, the joys of having a toddler help in the kitchen. But I wouldn't have it any other way.

Gingerbread House

I love making Gingerbread Houses. I find the kits awesome. I've even made my own Gingerbread and cut the pieces to size in the past, but it's really hard to get them uniform and the same height/thickness. The kits are super-cheap. It doesn't matter what it tastes like because it's not like anyone's actually going to eat the icing or Gingerbread after it sits out for weeks. I got this Gingerbread Kit for $9 bucks which included the premade icing in a bag and lots of candy. We did add some extra candy we had laying around and some random leftover Halloween Candy. I like to always put the house on a sturdy cookie sheet, so we can decorate around the base, too. Plus it makes it easy to move around and catch fallen candies. Watch as Claire and I chat with Daddy about the house and stuff here:

Hammer Pants

I actually really like this outfit Claire is wearing. I think it's super cute! Josh thought it looked like MC Hammer Pants from back in the day though. Check it out here:



What do you think?

Happy St. Nick Day!

Yesterday, we celebrated the 2nd Sunday of Advent as well as St. Nick Day. Here is a video of Claire finding her loot:

LOOKING AND SMILING!

WOW! Here she is LOOKING AND SMILING! It's my new blog header, too, btw. If you haven't checked out my new blinkies on my page and our elf dance, please do so!

Princess Obsession

Here is Claire playing with her Nativity Set and some of her Princess Dolls. I'm thinking they were the "Three Wise Women."
Every time I take pictures, she screams "Take a picture of me running in a circle!" Why? They make for terrible pictures, but I think she gets a kick out of seeing them on the little screen.

She is insisting on wearing dresses the past few days "I wanna wear a dress like Princesses!" BUT she doesn't like to wear tights or sweaters. Hmm. A slight issue in Midwestern Winter!

Movie Night!

We enjoy having our neighbors over to hang out. We usually order pizza or Chinese and eat together and then the kids can play/sit and watch a movie for 2 minutes before getting up to play. I was trying to get them to all look. Kind of pointless with a movie on and suckers in hand. Oh, and this is the couch that went into the "man cave" AKA: Josh's office after we got our new recliner. We've had this loveseat nearly 10 years! It was the first piece of furniture we bought together. Aww.
Claire and Amelia enjoying some sweet suckers!

Science Proves It

I found a great Power Point Presentation about brain development and why it is so harmful to babies. Here it explains why leaving an infant to cry it out or "gradually" cry it out is abuse. Bascially it talks about infants 12 months and under. However, I don't see it much different for something like a 14 month old, other than the fact that their brain may be more developed. But I wouldn't risk it!

Placenta Eating

Wow. Here is an interesting blog post on eating placentas. All I can say is...wow. I don't know if I could bring myself to eat my own placenta. It seems sort of cannibalistic in a way. But I'm not a huge meat person, and I like red meats even less. What do you think?

New Comfy Cozy Seating

Last weekend on Saturday and Sunday we went shopping for a new recliner for downstairs.
Downstairs is also where our "little" Christmas tree is. This recliner is sooo comfy. Come over and try it out. You can sleep in it, it's that comfy cozy!

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